Rochdale Council is locked in a fierce internal debate this week over whether two pubs should be allowed to have murals, or as they’ve called them, “threatening acts of colour”.
The Treehouse Bar and Hogarths, both located perilously close to the town centre’s last functioning Greggs, have applied to slap a bit of art on their walls as part of the Common Walls Mural Festival. Locals responded with their usual mix of suspicion and the phrase, “What’s a mural when it’s at home?”
The murals would be visible from Baillie Street, a sentence that hasn’t previously contained the word “visible”, as most of Baillie Street is usually shrouded in a fine mist of despair and fag ash.
Council officials, clearly startled by the idea of anything being described as “bright” or “international”, have launched a full-scale heritage panic. Emergency meetings were held. Clipboards were waved. One councillor reportedly fainted after seeing a test sketch that featured three colours and a smiling face.
“The area in question is a grey wall behind an old bank,” said one campaigner, “which is currently less ‘heritage asset’ and more ‘concrete confession booth for smokers’.”
Hogarths, which used to be a bank before it was gentrified into a gin palace with functioning toilets, wants to decorate the back of the building. The Treehouse Bar has gone one better by targeting the side of their building, specifically a chimney breast, which is brave given the average Rochdale punter thinks “chimney breast” is either a food item or a euphemism.
Supporters of the murals say the art will “bring colour and vitality to Rochdale”, which is frankly a bold statement in a town where colour is still viewed with suspicion and vitality is what gets stolen off parked scooters.
A council report said the mural would be “reversible”, which is important in case Rochdale ever wants to return to its original setting: Cold War East Germany.
Locals have been split. Some are excited. Others have asked whether this is a distraction from the rising cost of Stella. One man claimed the murals might open “a portal to Stockport”, though this has yet to be confirmed.
The festival is due to take place in September, assuming the town hasn’t spontaneously combusted from cultural overstimulation. If approved, Rochdale may soon have ten new murals, thousands of visitors, and one very confused mayor wondering why anyone came on purpose.
