Skip to content
Today: Sunday, March 15 2026
Rochdale Times
Rochdale Times
Rochdale Times
Rochdale Times
  • Home
  • Local News
  • National News
  • International News
  • Entertainment
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Features
  • Agony Aunt

What are You Looking For?

Trending News

Air ambulance, police plane and half of Rochdale deployed after man shot in leg

Air ambulance, police plane and half of Rochdale deployed after man shot in leg

on March 5, 2026March 5, 2026
Posted by Peter Ian Staker
Bowlee car boot sale returns as council confirms “mystery boxes from town hall basement” may also appear

Bowlee car boot sale returns as council confirms “mystery boxes from town hall basement” may also appear

on March 4, 2026March 4, 2026
Posted by Rita Roebuck
Council quietly launches “heritage skills” prison training scheme for councillors’ future needs

Council quietly launches “heritage skills” prison training scheme for councillors’ future needs

on March 4, 2026March 4, 2026
Posted by Rita Roebuck
Rochdale braces for light snow and heavy panic as yellow warning issued

Rochdale braces for light snow and heavy panic as yellow warning issued

on February 3, 2026February 3, 2026
Posted by Peter Ian Staker
  • Home
  • Local News
  • National News
  • International News
  • Entertainment
  • Politics
  • Sports
  • Features
  • Agony Aunt
News Flash

Air ambulance, police plane and half of Rochdale deployed after man shot in leg

on March 5, 2026March 5, 2026
Posted by Peter Ian Staker

Bowlee car boot sale returns as council confirms “mystery boxes from town hall basement” may also appear

on March 4, 2026March 4, 2026
Posted by Rita Roebuck

Council quietly launches “heritage skills” prison training scheme for councillors’ future needs

on March 4, 2026March 4, 2026
Posted by Rita Roebuck

Rochdale braces for light snow and heavy panic as yellow warning issued

on February 3, 2026February 3, 2026
Posted by Peter Ian Staker

Rochdale celebrates not being last as towns win ‘least depressing’ awards in baffling new list

on February 3, 2026
Posted by Rita Roebuck

Councillors soldier into AI fiasco as Tarrant‑Short turned into midlife crisis poster boy

on January 7, 2026January 7, 2026
Posted by Rita Roebuck

King’s Christmas message accidentally broadcast from Waitrose car park speaker system

on December 25, 2025December 25, 2025
Posted by Rita Roebuck
  • Home
  • National News

National News

23 posts
King’s Christmas message accidentally broadcast from Waitrose car park speaker system
Posted in Local News

King’s Christmas message accidentally broadcast from Waitrose car park speaker system

on December 25, 2025December 25, 2025
Rita Roebuck
Prince Andrew hires Rochdale Times as official PR team, citing ‘experience with reputational disasters’
Posted in Local News

Prince Andrew hires Rochdale Times as official PR team, citing ‘experience with reputational disasters’

on October 31, 2025October 31, 2025
Peter Ian Staker
Local insurance broker appointed deputy lieutenant, now officially entitled to wave royally
Posted in Local News

Local insurance broker appointed deputy lieutenant, now officially entitled to wave royally

on October 15, 2025October 18, 2025
Rita Roebuck
Royal mail fined £21 million for being fashionably late, as heywood and middleton sigh, ‘told you so’
Posted in Local News

Royal mail fined £21 million for being fashionably late, as heywood and middleton sigh, ‘told you so’

on October 14, 2025October 18, 2025
Rita Roebuck
What the first named storm of the season means for Rochdale’s weather as Storm Mike comes to town
Posted in Entertainment

What the first named storm of the season means for Rochdale’s weather as Storm Mike comes to town

on October 9, 2025October 19, 2025
Rita Roebuck
Manchester Airport insists it’s not hell on Earth, just “hell-adjacent”
Posted in Local News

Manchester Airport insists it’s not hell on Earth, just “hell-adjacent”

on September 8, 2025September 9, 2025
Peter Ian Staker
Nation braced for 10-second apocalypse rehearsal as government tests its shouting rectangles
Posted in Local News

Nation braced for 10-second apocalypse rehearsal as government tests its shouting rectangles

on September 6, 2025September 9, 2025
Rita Roebuck
Night bus pilot to Rochdale hailed as miracle cure for loneliness, hangovers and being stranded outside JD Wetherspoons
Posted in Local News

Night bus pilot to Rochdale hailed as miracle cure for loneliness, hangovers and being stranded outside JD Wetherspoons

on September 5, 2025September 9, 2025
Peter Ian Staker
Toothless and flag-waving with Heywood declaring independence from dental care
Posted in Local News

Toothless and flag-waving with Heywood declaring independence from dental care

on August 28, 2025August 28, 2025
Peter Ian Staker
Doctors beg public to stop turning their bums into chip shops
Posted in National News

Doctors beg public to stop turning their bums into chip shops

on August 7, 2025
Susan Emmott

Posts navigation

← Older Articles

No widgets added yet. Add widgets on Off-canvas Drawer .

We are the Rochdale Times — offering a slightly less accurate version of events, albeit with more readers and no obligation to pretend it's poor journalism.

Total Visitors: 20783

Entirely unrelated to any similarly or same named publications — this Rochdale Times is 100% satire, with no journalistic integrity implied, or accidentally achieved.

© All rights reserved. Rochdale Times
  • Home
  • Privacy Policy