First and Stagecoach call truce, Metroline says “nah, we’re good”
Just when Greater Manchester thought it could go back to ignoring bus timetables entirely, Metroline drivers have confirmed they will definitely be striking this week, proving once again that hope is dangerous and consistency is a lie.
While their colleagues at First and Stagecoach have been temporarily pacified by “revised offers” and possibly a tin of biscuits, Metroline staff have opted for the nuclear option and will now grind 130 routes to a halt between Tuesday and Thursday, including some dedicated school buses and whatever service that one bloke in Stockport uses once a fortnight to go to Aldi.
The move affects large parts of southern Greater Manchester, but passengers in Bolton, Bury, Oldham, Rochdale, Salford and Wigan can relax knowing their buses are, miraculously, still operational, for now. The rest are advised to check the TfGM website, consult an oracle, or simply guess and hope for the best.
“We’re disappointed,” said TfGM’s Chief Network Officer Danny Vaughan, gazing wearily at a map covered in red Xs and the faint scent of despair. “We were hoping Metroline might see sense and accept the improved offer, but it seems they’ve chosen chaos and public inconvenience.”
In an ironic twist, strike-hit passengers can use their bus passes on trams and trains instead, assuming they can squeeze into a Metrolink carriage already filled with angry commuters, schoolchildren, and one very confused dog.
Meanwhile, Unite the Union is still keeping its powder dry for six more strike days across October, just in case any remaining hope dares to resurface in the hearts of passengers.
Talks are ongoing, with optimism reportedly located somewhere behind the vending machine in the TfGM canteen.
Reporting from down the M62, we at the Rochdale Times advise our readers to take up roller-skating, buy a sturdy umbrella, or befriend a man with a horse. It may be the only way to get to work this week without crying.
